It’s Okay to be Selfish

It is important to be selfish at times – more often than just “once in a while.”  Kids seem to know when they want need that one-on-one time with their beloved teddy bear and not share. Why do we adults deny ourselves these same basic need?


In our quest to “have it all” we sometimes lose the fun and joy of the journey.  Soon the definition of “all” warps and we find ourselves wishing for the world to stop spinning so fast so we can just have a few moments of quiet time.

Sound familiar?

This is a big reason Tricia and I took a brief hiatus from this blog over the summer.  We needed to step back, regroup, and yes, be SELFISH for a bit. Our selfishness was focused. We both worked out what we want in this “second half of our century” on this Earth and how we want to find it.

Selfishness to us means self-care, self-appreciation, and self-nurturing. We are done being the proverbial “tail that wags the dog!” We both made fundamental changes in our day-to-day schedules and made room for what brings us joy.  The result?

We’ve come back stronger, sharper and – most importantly – SATISFIED with our path.

We actually get more things done, have extra time left over for those we love AND – the best part, we’re much happier at the end of each day.

Here’s a little insight into the “how” of it:

  • Figure out what you MISS (WANT) THE MOST:  What do you long for?  Most of us will say “more time” but we all know time is finite and fleeting. (Too bad we can’t borrow Captain Jack Sparrow’s compass, that would make this part much easier!) Think about WHY you miss/want whatever it is and how you’ll feel once you have it.  There you will find your Primary Goal.
  • Delegate, streamline, or bundle everything else and LET IT GO:  The biting reality is that we cannot be everywhere and do everything. It is important to let others help and accept less than perfect. The quest for perfection is not as admirable as we like to imagine it is – it’s one of the biggest culprits that keeps us from what we want the most.

The concept may be simple, but it’s not that easy to do. It takes time, practice and dedication to make it happen.  A little something each and every day toward the Primary Goal and do your best to let the rest go.  After a short while, that other “stuff” will start to fade into the background.

Most important, let yourself ENJOY being selfish.  It’s these moments that count the most.



About Lora Bailey

Pianist, runner, author, yogi, wife and dog-mommy
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